


Hair

by Cristy_duck



Category: Kinnikuman Nisei | Ultimate Muscle, キン肉マン | Kinnikuman (Manga)
Genre: Alien Cultural Differences, Comic, Gen, Hair, Italian Character(s), Italian Stereotypes, Italiano | Italian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-22
Updated: 2019-07-22
Packaged: 2020-07-10 19:50:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19911235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cristy_duck/pseuds/Cristy_duck
Summary: Italian are known for they excellent style and hair. But what if an Alien doesn't know that and tries to joke with the ... fire?





	Hair

**Author's Note:**

> I'm Italian and I wrote a ff with an Italian stereotype ... that said, hope you like it!
> 
> P.S.: there are some phrases in Italian, but I think you can understand even without Google Translate <3

It is said that the Italians spend most of their lives choosing the best outfit, the best perfume, the best hair cut … just to look amazing and to make other know their Italians. Is that true? Well … yes, but it’s not that they do it just to know they _know_ how to dress up, they do it just because of culture.

And that is why in some countries, like Japan, people are amazing fan of the Italian style. They think Italians are always dressed up like a businessman, wear hats and give roses to their loved ones. But are you sure you’re not stereotyping too much? Are you sure your mind is not too much filled up with stereotyping movies about Italians?

Well, we’ll see if an Italian Chojin like Mars can shed light about an Italian stereotype most of the world doesn’t know: the obsession with their hair. Let’s find out!

***

Mantaro was looking at the tall figure of the Italian man that was standing in the ring along with Kevin Mask, and he was having the upper-hand of the match, but the prince was not surprised, Kevin told him many times that he knew Mars could beat him, that was a practical demonstration. Not bad at all, though the prince.

But there was a thing that he could not stop thinking about: Mars’ hair. What turned into metal so to wound his opponents were his hair or not? And if it wasn’t, where were his hair? What colour were they? Blonde, red, black? Did he dye his hair, or he didn’t? Did he have hair?

Well, he knew his mom, Belinda, had really beautiful hair, a great golden blonde that had the smell of aloe, and his dad had his hair covered in the mask for like his entire life … he had brown hair, Kevin, Terry and Jade had blond hair, but Mars? He knew Italians had a prevailing brown colour of hair, but maybe …

And so, he decided to put on a little joke to make the Italian reveal his hair – unfortunately, he didn’t know what would happen next …

«Ehy, Mars, your hair pretty messy today, you know? They look like a barn! They seem really stringy, too …» had he never said it!

The Italian stopped the fight immediately, froze deep in the position of a Classical statue and started to blink only by his right eyes, like a tic. Kevin looked him dazed but he couldn’t speak because his friend said, in Italian, and so he couldn’t understand: «Cazzo! Lo sapevo che questi shampoo giapponesi facevano male ai miei capelli! Devo subito andare da Riccardo!» and he grabbed his phone and called his hairstylist, saying: «Ricky, sono io. Tra un’ora sono da te, devi salvarmi!» and then he flew away.

Mantaro got close to Kevin, and said: «It was just a joke, I didn’t mean that all the way …»

«Bah, you should know Italians are strange, and became stranger when you touch them on their look!»

«Oh, ok … it’s not something that metters in my culture, so I didn’t think that … I’m sorry …»

«No, don’t be sorry, Mantaro. You saved my back from a German suplex … do you want to drink something?»

«Yes! A mojito!»

Kevin shook his head: «You can’t drink it, you’re a minor.»

«But you can order it for me~!»

«You’ll drink a coke.» said firmly Kevin, and so the Kinniku had to follow him on a bar near the gym.

While they were relaxing in the bar, the hour said by Mars passed, and a figure entered the bar: it was him. He ran to the place the two of them sat, and asked, picking up Mantaro by the shirt collar and removing what Mantaro though as hair, revealing a strawberry-red hair: «Now tell me, how do my hair look?!»

«G-Great!»

Mars let go of Mantaro: «Oh, grazie a Dio! Avrei potuto morire!» and then he got out of the bar, smiling.

And yes, Italians are obsessed with their hair, as you all have seen. And that’s a flaw that will make them look even cooler.


End file.
